* The words ‘plane crash’ and ‘New York’ bring an instant chill to most, so there’s something strangely euphoric about the latest incident. An Airbus 320 has crashed into the Hudson River, and remarkably it seems that everybody has survived. Within a minute of taking off, the flight reported birds hitting the engine, and asked to make an emergency landing at a Jersey airport. They didn’t make it that far, and the pilot brought the craft down into the river (leading to the remarkable vision of a plane slowly sinking while being circled by ferries). That the 150 passengers, and 5 crew cheated death is a remarkable testament to that pilot’s ability. Never before has a crash so thoroughly recommended a person’s skill. It also led to the strange phrase being uttered “If you’re going to be in a plane crash, this was the one to be in.”
* The idiotic Johnny Knoxville has been detained at LAX after an x-ray screening revealed he was carrying a fake grenade in his carry on luggage. He claimed it was a prop he had ‘forgotten’ he was carrying. People have been jailed for less, but he was actually allowed to board his flight. It always helps when there is cinematic proof of your stupidity to back up your story.
* An Aussie man claims that ever since he saw the Virgin Mary and baby Jesus in his lava lamp his life has been blessed. It’s helped him find work and a partner. Given the lava lamp’s long and illustrious association with 1970′s drug culture, I leave everyone to draw their own conclusions on the sighting.
* If any other nation had bombed local UN headquarters we would be talking instant sanctions. Outrage, unilateral responses, the full works. Israel does it, says ‘woops’, and carries on finalising a deal for US support in blocking arms shipments from reaching Gaza. No one is coming out of that one with credibility intact.
* The Flash Mob, once the domain of people trying to make statements and stand-out (before heading off for a satisfying plate of tofu) has now been successfully hijacked by The Man. In Britain 400 strangers at Liverpool Street Station paused as they went about their business to perform a synchronized dance. For a T-Mobile ad set to launch on TV the next day.
* Conspiracy theorists, X-Files fans, science buffs and every kid that’s ever looked the sky and wondered, rejoice. NASA has not ruled out the possibility of life on Mars, and has even suggested that some hardier organisms may still exist. The proof? Methane. Gas emissions. I’m getting my geek on right … now.
* Headline of the day goes to the New York Post with ‘Sapphic Duo Kiss and Make Up’. You can tell they really wanted to say ‘lesbian’, but wanted to appear tasteful at the same time.
