It’s Hollywood Baby; Please Welcome MISTER PRESIDENT

So did you get the flyers under your windscreen wipers? Did you see the pamphlets in your mail box? If not let me fill you in. The United States of America is now under new management. New Commander-in-chief Barack Obama has finally taken office and will try to eradicate some of the cockroaches and bad hygiene practices and raise the country’s rating from a D to an A . And we will all be watching.

I have to say, being in America and witnessing the inauguration live on TV was a surreal experience. And remarkably significant that it occurred the day after the nation celebrated Martin Luther King Day with their Kingdom Parade. Man, how they love their parades. Every time I take the trash out I fully expect 5 floats and a marching band to come by to celebrate the moment. But I digress.

The scale on which the inauguration was covered on every television channel was bordering on hysteria, the likes of which apparently haven’t been seen since JFK. I guess when you look back at past presidents since then it’s easy to see why BO is so popular. A quick history lesson – after the tragic assassination of JFK in 1961, LBJ was appointed president. Appointed, not elected. So hardly the people’s choice. After LBJ came Nixon and we all know how that ended. After his resignation in 1974 Gerald Ford was appointed president. Again, appointed – not elected. The G-Ford lasted one term before being replaced by Jimmy Carter but JC’s last year of office was full of dramas with hostages in Iran, his return to the Panama Canal Zone and the Soviet Invasion of Afghanistan (hmmm, why didn’t they just let Russia do the job back then?) and so the American people felt that they needed to put their trust in the one person that could lead their Nation successfully – an actor. Cue Ronald Reagan, a man who was originally a Democrat but switched to being a Republican – good to know he was solid on his political stance. I guess being an actor, he felt he could play any role. He rode off into the sunset in 1989 to be replaced by George Bush Senior who uttered the infamous words “read my lips – no new taxes” … and then increased taxes and lasted only 1 term in office. Then came the man, Bill Clinton, the sax-playing smooth talker who, whilst being a very popular President was hardly the stuff of moral fortitude. His impeachment left quite a stain on the Oval Office. They are still scrubbing the carpet. And no one has ever looked at a cigar the same way again. Apparently when he lost the election to George W Bush, his staff removed all the ‘W”s from the keyboards in the White House. I’m sure “Dubbya” would have done the same for Obama … except spelling was never George’s strong point. In the words of David Tua…”Can I have an ‘O’ for ‘Awesome’ thanks”. And so finally we hear those 4 words that we have all been waiting for. “Former President George Bush”. Can I hear an Amen?

And now you can see why the election of BO is seen as such a landmark. This is the first president to write his own speeches since Lincoln. The man has it all – he’s smooth, sophisticated, smart and yet amongst it all, still knows how to be cool. What other President would walk out to his adoring crowd at the first of 10 Inauguration Balls with the opening statement, “First of all, how good looking is my wife?” So cool. If that was Clinton we’d all be saying how he was making sure he pulled one last time with the missus before taking office. But not BO. He’s the favourite teacher you had at school. The one you respected but still felt like they were your best friend. The one that didn’t try to be liked by everyone, they just were.

And if you have any doubt of his influence and popularity already you only need step outside your front door in America. The latest Spiderman Comic features an Obama storyline and is already a collector’s item. People have lined up to secure their piece of history by buying copies of the Washington Post with Obama being sworn in on the front page at $10 a copy – they are limited to 5 per customer so they don’t run out. Late night infomercials offer the latest in decorative plates and coins featuring a portrait of ‘Barry’ (which is what students at his former college call him) with his “generous smile and kind eyes”. Um ok. The Political Americana store offers over 150 different items featuring the great man – from Obama Bobble-heads to Obama Hot Sauce. Finally, when someone says “oh look I’ve spilled some of the President’s hot sauce on my dress” the nation won’t be plunged into a moral crisis. But you know, no pressure on the man.

Of course now the hard work begins. But not before a night of dancing and partying. Did you see it? The whole day was quite something to behold. An official inauguration poet? Are you kidding me? The first dance? It was like watching the most lavish wedding reception of all time. You had the bad wedding singer (Shakira murdering Van Morrison’s ‘Bright side of the road’ … and come on, Maroon 5 singing ‘This Love’? Have they not had a hit since then?) There was the awkward speech that everyone cringed through – yeah that’s right Ray Romano, who invited you? And does anyone else find it weird that the song “My Country ‘tis of Thee” as sung by Aretha Franklin, is the same tune as ‘God Save The Queen’? Then of course there was Oprah exclaiming that “it feels like the whole country is practically vibrating”. That probably has less to do with the mood and more to do with the actual vibration caused by the shrill voice of Oprah screaming out “Please welcome….MR PRESSSSSIDEEEEEEEEENNNNNNNNNNNNT!”

And so here’s to a new era. A new day. A new dawning. Finally Barack can get onto those things that he has been waiting so patiently to do for so long – which is why he fought so hard to keep his Blackberry. His first order of business must surely be changing his Facebook status to read “Barack Obama is the President”.

Ed’s note: That extraordinary image of Barack Obama is by Tsevis on Flickr and was selected as one of the pictures of the year for 2008, by TIME magazine. Check out his photostream here, it’s absolutely wonderful.